JL KAH

Likeable people tend to be happier and more successful in life.  They receive better services, stand better chances at being promoted or voted, close deals easily, make more money, receive help readily and get hitched easily.

The good news is – likeability is not inborn.  Yes, likeability can be acquired.  Anyone can become a more likeable person in 9 easy ways as follows:

1) Wear a smile.  Ask yourself which of these faces would you prefer to see.  A smiling face? A frowning face?  An angry face? Or a face with no emotions?  Choose the one that you like and do it.

2) Be friendly, nice and polite.  Remember that you can catch more flies with honey than vinegar.

3) Be happy and positive.  When you radiate positive energy, people will gravitate positively towards you.

4) Improve your listening skill.  Sometimes we have a habit of interrupting when someone is speaking.  Be patient.  Don’t interrupt.  Let the person finish what he or she has to say.  Show empathy.  Acknowledge what has been said.  When it’s your turn to speak, always do so in a constructive manner.

5) Be generous with your compliments.  But do be sincere.  Give genuine compliments.  These will create good feelings.  Don’t fake compliments as people can see through them and will lose respect for you.

6) Stop complaining, whining or gossiping.  It only creates negative feelings and drives people away.

7) Be helpful and willing to share.  You can show a new colleague the ropes.  You can share gardening tips with your neighbor.  You can share home-baked pies with friends.

8)  Don’t just focus on yourself.  Always consider the interests of others.  Conduct yourself in a considerate and thoughtful manner.

9) Always do unto others as you would have others do unto you.  If you want others to respect you, respect others.  If you do not want to be judged, don’t judge others.

As you bring out the best in yourself, your likeability factor will increase and your life and that of those around you will be greatly lifted.

Temptations are everywhere.  The wonder drug advert.  The latest gadget.  The junk food in your office drawer.  The buy 1 get 1 free offer.  The massive 50% discount off an item.  The get rich quick scheme.  The high payout from gambling…

How do we tread in a world of temptations?  How do we not get ourselves trapped?  Here’s some ways to get around them:

1) The easiest way is to avoid, avoid and avoid.  If you know of a tempting big sale happening, don’t attend.  Don’t kid yourself saying that you are only looking around.  Most of the time, you will end up buying things you don’t really need.

2) Always prepare a shopping list before you shop.  Just pick the things you need and leave the rest alone.  The green tea chocolates could be tempting.  The little black dress could be tempting.  The latest iPhone could be tempting.

3) Always check against your needs.  When you are out shopping, you may be bombarded by seemingly irresistible offers.  An example could be buy 1 get 1 free offer.  Don’t fall into the trap.  Ask yourself if you really need the item.  You are not getting a good deal if it is something you do not need even if it comes with freebies.  You are paying for something that you don’t need.  For consumables with short shelf-life, ask yourself if you can reasonably consume the extra within its expiry date.  Don’t force it down your throat.

4) Don’t create opportunity for temptations to arise.  Never leave junk food within easy reach.  Moderate your purchase of junk food if you cannot totally avoid junk food cravings.  Another way is to substitute with healthy food.  The same principle applies to other temptations.  Don’t walk into a drinking hole if you are avoiding drinking.  Don’t step into a tobacco shop if you are quitting smoking.

5) Now coming to the get rich quick schemes.  We see them everywhere especially over the internet.  They promise easy cash and big profit for some upfront payment.  Even if the payment is small, don’t fall prey.  Don’t let good money chase after bad money.

6) The high payout from gambling can be tempting.  It is no wonder that many people are trapped.  The banker will always win at the end of the day.  Why?  The answer is human greed.  Most people do not know when to stop or how to stop even after winning.  Motivated by greed, they will continue to gamble until they lose them all.  Some even take up loans hoping to recoup their losses, but they usually end up incurring more debts and getting into trouble.  Stay away from the gambling table unless you are a disciplined person who can walk away in the midst of winning or who can stop after losing a preset amount.

7) The world is moving fast.  New products emerge one after another.  The latest gadget with incredible functions.  The wonder drug with incredible power.  Before you part with your cash, ask yourself if you really need them.  Can you  live without it?  Will it make much difference if you don’t own them?  Or do you want it simply to appease your ego?  When bombarded with temptations, always take a step back.  Value money. Don’t be too eager to part with it for no good reason.

It may seem daunting at first.  But persist.  With every effort to resist temptation, your willpower will increase and you will be moving towards better control for better living.